What in the actual fuck? Today has been a cluster fuck of a circle jerk! She was told she couldn’t call me because I’m the ”victim.” In order for her to do so, I’d have to fill out a form. I went to five different government buildings, talking to seven different people only to find out it was bullshit. There was no form, and there was no order for her to not contact me. The only people who actually helped me out was the prosecutor’s office, both the victim’s advocate and the prosecutor herself. It was all day of going to places and calling people to either be told to go somewhere else or they were waiting for a call back. Holy pickled pirate peckers! (I love alliteration.)

Things look promising for tomorrow. We have to play it by ear because with the amount of complete bullshit that happened today, it’s hard to tell what’s real and what’s not. Right now, it doesn’t look like she’ll be able to come home until the bond is amended (which I tried to do today, but I got stonewalled), or the trial is done. It doesn’t make any sense because that stipulation was based on there being an investigation, which there doesn’t seem to be. If it holds true, I will be able to see her for a few hours tomorrow and then not for a few weeks. Her attorney said they were filing an amendment to the bond, but didn’t say what it was, and who knows when that bond hearing will be. I don’t think these few weeks will seem as long as this past week, not knowing what the fuck was going to happen.

A part of me is relieved. A part of me is sad. A part of me is joyful. I’m relieved (assuming it continues this way *knock on wood*) that there doesn’t appear to be more charges, even though no one can tell us anything definite. I’m sad that I might not be able to see her for a few weeks, but I’m joyful that things seem to be stepping in the right direction after a horrific set of events. It’s a mix of emotions. I’lll tell y’all one thing though: I’ve never cried so many times and so often in a week’s time. I’m going to cry more when I see her. It’ll be sobs of joy. It might look ugly, but it’ll be beautiful.