Today started off with a mixed bag. My dreams were frustratingly annoying. I dreamt that I was messaging and talking to someone very special. That was great, but I was trying to find this person. Every time I think I’m close, something fucks it up. Oh, I have to put in badge access systems for a Taylor Swift concert? Well fuck… Why are all these boards not assembled? The concert starts in an hour? WTF people?! Okay. That settled. Another message or two, and I’m off to find this person. Wait, what? Our truck is being shot at by terrorists? Mother fucker! It seemed to go on all night. I mean, I was ecstatic to message and talk to this person, but frustrated that all of this dumb shit kept popping up that was preventing me from finding her.
I wake up to an annoying cat that is weirdly meowing and trying to step on my hernia incision. It’s like a pet cemetery meow too. It’s 7:00AM, so I get up and feed this cat, take my meds, and then head downstairs. As the day progressed, my mood got lighter. The feeling of happiness started to overtake me. The dark clouds of the last few months started to dissipate. The sun was shining, both figuratively and literally. It dawned on me that I have been depressed for a very long time. I was so depressed, I didn’t even give a fuck to shave my face. The only time I had my beard trimmed was when I went to get my hair cut. Today, I trimmed the goatee and shaved my neck. It felt good. I was moving to the music in my head and in the truck. I felt alive!
And then, it all comes crashing down in a fiery mass of burning horse shit. WHY?!?!?! WTF? This was a great day! Answer: toxic people. When kids do dumb shit, it is my job as a parental unit to instruct them in a better way of doing shit. Why do kids have to argue about every motherfucking thing? Why does he have to argue that 10 days is not 2 weeks? Why?! That’s not even the best part! It all has to do with him not having to do shit around the house because I had surgery. He’s counting down the days until I can lift heavy shit again. Selfish little fucker. The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. Shit like this is the only reason I want to drink.
Inhale Jesus, exhale Satan. As does the liver, I too must flush the toxins from my life.